Eff you uterus (and ovaries), eff you.

Before your proceed... I would like to apologize for my language in this post.

::ok, go ahead, you've been warned::



So I went in today for another checkup before starting Estrace. I've been on Lupron for a while and just got off BCP last week.

There's fucking fluid in my uterus, my lining is VERY thin (1.67) and I have fucking follicles trying to mature. My AFC was around 20ish and there are 5-7 that are creeping up on 11mm. My E2 number was 94.2.

My body won't fucking ovulate once on it's own in 3 damn years and now it's pulling this shit when it's supposed to be fully suppressed. The only thing that is suppressed is my lining, which with my lining issues in the past isn't surprising.



I'm now going to have to double my Lupron dosage and do it twice a day, which means I'll have to give one of my shots to myself at school. Every cycle it's been something. Fresh IVF I developed OHSS, FET #1 my lining sucked ass, and now this crap.



I also found out that they want to see my this coming Friday to see if we'll proceed or not. Since it's short notice they can only get me in at 10:00 which means I have to take a fucking half day without pay off from school.

 I've been having one of the shittiest few weeks with my emotions related to IF. I have never felt this down about myself before in my life and now this. I don't know how much more I can take.